Showtime On Demand Rocks My Socks!

17 05 2007

I’ve told you guys before that I’m shamelessly addicted to Showtime’s new show, The Tudors. I’ve always been in love with the time period and though I’ve gotten into some serious historical slumps in my reading before, this show has definitely amped my longing for more historicals.

The show is filled to the brim with loads of romance, deceit and all the drama that keeps me coming back for more. And the clothes? Oh goodness, the dresses the women wore back then are absolutely gorgeous, their jewels and their titles and just everything about a historical woman, or a woman in the time of Henry, well if you were part of the royal court then you were seriously living the life. It’s sort of like Modern Day Hollywood. Everyone loves them and wants to be them for they are a sort of royalty, don’t you think?

But though the Hollywood peeps of these days are super rich and can do what they choose, they do not hold a candle to the likes of King Henry and the people of his court. I am so wrapped up in the things these people get themselves into. The characters, based on true people, what’s not to love?


So I’m getting ready to spoil the hell out of this coming week’s episode so you guys (which most of you lovely readers aren’t watching this show anyway since none of you guys have Showtime, well except for you Grace, but we’ve talked about this already so it’s all good in the hood) but anyway, this is your warning…MAJOR SPOILERS BELOW FOR THIS COMING WEEKS ALL NEW EPISODE, SO IF YOU DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT HAPPENS, MOVE ALONG TO THE NEXT AVAILABLE POST, ALRIGHTY?




Moving along….

So the show left off last week with everyone dying of the sweating sickness. I am still in utter shock that they killed off one of my favorite characters on this show, WILLIAM! Is it because his name is Compton? Is that why he just had to die? Because lots of bad things happen to people in Compton, California, is that why they felt the need to kill my William (okay not my William but Thomas’ William) off so early in the season?

The shame!

I am so going to miss his character and his jovial self. He was a good friend of the Kings and he was a terrific friend to the only man that matters to me in this whole show….Charles Brandon.


The whole Thomas/William love affair is no more because William is now dead and Thomas has moved on to a pair of sisters, he chose one sister and I guess he chose wrong because the sister he kissed in the dimly lit hallway suffered the same fate that his one true love William did…she died of the sweating sickness that has swept over all of England.

What’s man to do in his place? Why, marry her sister, of course!

Oh the drama and aparently the sister that lives, the one that Thomas plans to marry or married or whatever, is being haunted by the dead sister…DISFLIPPINGUSTING! But Thomas don’t give a good hot damn, he’s too busy traveling all over her body with his hands and tongue to care about a damn ghost…he’s getting laid by a lady ya’ll….go on and handle your business, Thomas…do the damn thing.

So while Thomas is grieving in the arms of women and not men, because he can only love one man, Charles is effing his way through the whole of England, the bloody bastard! And only a very shallow woman like myself would look over something as vile as a cheating bastard because he’s just so hot damn fine! I can’t help it, I love Charles Brandon, the guy is the friggin’ shiznit! He’s just so hot dang dreamy, he makes McDreamy look like Frodo Baggins Uncle from Lord of the Rings when he gets all ugly like because of his obsession with the ring.

No joke!

But anyway, so last week, King Henry learns that a way to prevent getting the sweating sickness is to exercise, sweat out the toxins and whatever and what better way to get your sweat on than by getting your swerve on? So last week, we see Charles Brandon, the Duke of Suffolk getting his swerve on with some no name married broad, who is NOT his wife, the lovely Margaret Tudor Brandon. My heart broke when I found out that Charles is not my Knight in Shining Armor, he’s nothing but a bastard rake!

Check this video clip out and pay close attention to what Henry Cavill says about his character, Charles Brandon:

“He can’t seem to keep his dick in his pants!”

I couldn’t have said it any better…I felt really bad for Margaret because she already doubted her marriage and the wisdom of marrying Brandon in such haste and when she was banished from court, she was so mad and to see Brandon going on with his little women on the side, it tarnishes his appeal, not all the way, mind you, I’m much too shallow to hate Charles Brandon merely for a few indiscretions (yeah yeah I know, horrible, huh?) ….though I wish he were a little uglier or something.

But he’s not and I’m still just as smitten with him today as I was before all the cheating. This week’s episode, we see a lot more of Charles and Margaret, not a whole lot but more than we’ve seen of the two in the last couple of episodes.

And Margaret breaks my heart with what she says to Charles about his love. And I quote: (I totally rewound this part of the show like a million times so that I’d get it right, I just HAD to include this in my blog post so that I will remember it for all time!)

Charles says, “I loved you,” and Margaret’s reply was:

“You don’t know the meaning of the word, Charles. You can love, perhaps for a year, a month, even for an hour, and for that hour, I do believe that you love well and deeply as any man. But after that hour, you love not. You love another and then another, your love is most generous where it is most hurtful.”

How sad is that?

My romantic heart and spirit demanded that Charles makes things right with Margaret. They demand that he makes amends for his actions, but the stupid dope doesn’t learn his lesson. He either doesn’t care or he wasn’t listening to a word she was saying, but it looked like he was. After Margaret rushes out of the room, Charles looks stunned and he looks like he apologetic….but what does he do when Henry sends him to France to question the King of France about the Cardinal the Pope sent to look into his divorce?

He tries to get at the QUEEN OF FRIGGIN FRANCE!

The guy has absolutely no morals! I know that it was the way of things back in the day but goodness man, you’re killing me here, it’s no wonder you don’t have a friggin’ STD, yeesh! Slow your frickin’ roll and fix things with your wife.

Oh goodness, in the previews for the next two episodes, it shows that something bad happens to Margaret or she did something terrible but whatever it is, it’s not good because there’s blood and everydamnthing. Holy crap it’s gonna be a good one guys, for real!

And I can’t bloody wait! This is the storyline that I love the most, it’s the storyline that I’m most anxious to watch every week, Grace and I have some theories on what might happen in this storyline and we certainly hope it DOES happen but goodness, I love Charles and Margaret!

Now King Henry and his divorce and everything.

I hate King Henry, he’s a pompous prick and for him to call Queen Katherine, heartless and full of hatred for not wanting the life that he is going to subject her to, all because he wants to marry some conniving little harlot, of all the nerve! So what, is Henry the only person that has feelings in the whole of England? Is Henry the only one that is allowed to love and be loved. He won’t even let Katherine have her dignity. With all the lies that he uses to support his case, none of which cast Queen Katherine in the brightest of lights, only marring her good name and tarnishing her good reputation. For him to call HER heartless made me want to kick him in the nuts and stomp them to itty bitty pieces, all while I have the pleasure of watching him writhe in pain, over and over again.


I cannot stand him and his prick ass! He’s a big loser, he loses at every damn thing. He got his ass kicked by the King of France in a wrestling match, he lost hand after hand while playing cards with William and Charles kicked his tail in arm wrestling (and he most certainly didn’t let Charles win that one, he lost because he’s weak and he sucks big donkey dick!) HE EVEN LOST IN CARDS TO ANNE!

No wonder he grows to be an old fat lard, he deserved to go through wife after wife, hoping to get his heir…goodness, I can’t stand that stupid man. And don’t even get me started on Wolsey, words cannot express my intense dislike for that odious man.


But hot damn, I can’t wait until next week for the all new episode, BRING IT ON!!!! I can’t believe there’s only 2 episodes left before the season is over, WHAT THE HELL??? What am I going to do with myself until it comes back? Was the season cut short because Jonathan Rhys Meyer put himself in rehab? I heard that’s what happened but is this why the season is so hot damn short? I mean, only 10 episodes? What’s really going on???

Anyway, look for my post on One Tree Hill because i watched that show too and it was the bizomb, so I’m sure I’ll be blogging all about it tomorrow…since I’ve got my blogging bug back.

Until tomorrow guys, peace out!




7 responses

17 05 2007

Awww, that quote makes me sad. And then Brandon is a little slut puppy too? Sigh.

17 05 2007

Yeah he is, Izzy but man he’s a hot slut puppy, don’t you agree? Me and Grace were talking yesterday about how we’re so wrong for still loving Brandon, even though he’s a slimy cheating bastard….haha, oh well.

But yeah, we’re all about this show, it’s the bomb diggity, make sure you netflix this when it comes out.


17 05 2007

It’s on my list already. Wheee!!!! I can’t wait.

The count of Monte Cristo was on last night, so I got my fill of Henry Cavill. Yay!

17 05 2007

GOOD JOB! You won’t be disappointed either, even Joey will get a kick out of this show because they do the nasty all the time. LOL.

And girl, Henry Cavill from Count of Monte Cristo does not hold a candle to Henry Cavill from The Tudors…in The Tudors, Henry is all MAN! LOVE HIM!!! You’ll be in love with him just like I am, no worries! hehe.

I think if you go to SHO.COM, you can watch the first 2 episodes of the season, something to whet your appetites!!!


20 05 2007
Rene Lyons

I’m dangerously addicted to the The Tudors. But then, you know I have a thing for history.

I simply hate Monday’s now because that means an entire week of getting my Tudors fix.

21 05 2007

I catch the episodes early on Showtime On Demand, do you have that? You can too if you do…I’m ahead of schedule and I love it!

9 06 2007
Paul Levinson

Good review – I’ve really enjoyed The Tudors … The Tudors Concludes: A Review

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