Dear Co Worker Friend,

25 05 2007


Yesterday when I came into your office, I was being my usual everyone loves Rowena self and making everyone laugh and looking pretty spiffy if I say so myself when I noticed sitting in the corner, was a good looking guy that I’ve never seen before in my life.

He was not looking at me, nor was he paying any attention to me so I turned to you and nodded in his direction, giving you the raising my eyebrow in question, who is that and where did he come from look that you know I only give you when I’m like, DAMN WHO IS THAT? and want to know who the hell he is. I know you saw that look because you shook your head real quick like and said, “No.”

It was your No that caught his attention because he looked up and saw me. He smiled. I smiled back at him and then you were forced to introduce us and he stood up.

I liked what I saw.

A lot.

He seemed to like what he saw too if the way his smile spread across his face all slowly while he took in stock. His look made me all giddy and yippee inside, bringing on a slow burn that I knew I was going to like.

And even though you introduced me as “The Polynesian” instead of the name my Mom and Dad gave me, I wasn’t caring because he was smiling and he had such a cutie smile. I tried to stay as long as I could but since he was there to do a job with the other two guys that he came with and they were waiting for him, we had to cut our little flirt fest short and since my business in your office was done, I was forced back to my upstairs domain and we weren’t able to cross paths, so I didnt see him for a good deal of the day.

Turns out he was out here from the East Coast auditing your department for our Business Unit. So he was pretty busy since he was only going to be in town for yesterday, which explained why I didn’t see him all that often considering he was in the SCIF the whole day and I’m not allowed to go in there since I’m not cleared.

But I knew he was downstairs, with you and I knew that because you’re my friend, you were trying to hook me up, because you know, I’d do the same for you.

So imagine my surprise when we were talking after work and I asked about him and you changed the subject. I was thinking, oh okay well maybe I was forgettable. Whatever, I guess, damn, but oh well. And then while I’m standing outside waiting for you, playing on my phone (texting with Chelsea), I notice that his friends are sitting in the car waiting for him and you walk out with him, talking and laughing and I can tell you’re being fake because that wasn’t your real laugh you gave him and when he saw me, I saw him smile and I know my face lit up but I didn’t say anything because you made it seem like he wasn’t interested, he said to me that it was nice to meet me and I said the same to him, then he put his hand out for me to take and I took it, I took it and asked him when he was leaving for home and he said that his flight was leaving today in the morning and when I told him that it was too bad, I really meant it because damn, he was really cute. He had cute blue eyes and he was tall and cutesy but in my head I was thinking, damn he’s not for me….because YOU MADE IT SEEM LIKE HE WASN’T INTERESTED!

But today, I was talking to Nicole at the front desk and I was telling her about the guy from yesterday and how hot damn he looked good and she was agreeing with me up until I said, “Man, I saw him checking me out but I guess he’s married or something because he didn’t take any of my hints”

Imagine my surprise when Nicole says, “What? Girl he wanted you, he was asking Sharon all these damn questions about you about where you’re from, what nationality you are, he said that you were really cute and he wanted your number, but Sharon said no, you weren’t interested. Hell, if I knew I would’ve hooked you up. But Sharon said you didn’t want to talk to him.”

So my question to you, my dear friend Sharon is…

WHY?

I asked you what happened and you said, “Nothing happened.” And you changed the subject, you made me think he wasn’t interested, that he said NOTHING about me and yet that wasn’t the case at all? Is it because you wanted him for yourself and he didn’t want you, is that why you’ve brought on the cockblockin’? Is that what this is all about?

Oh hold on, you’re calling me right now, I’m bout to ask you right the hell now.

Alright, I’m back and your answer was, “Because he’s an asshole.”

Oh hell to the no.

He had a nice ass to me, but now I won’t get to know him or anything because he went back home and I’m here and I don’t have his number or his last name and you keep telling me I’d be better off without him.

What the flip?

I’m so pissed at you right now I could spit and I don’t want to spit because I’m sitting at my desk and that’s just gross but dude, Sharon…that guy was fine. Don’t call me for lunch today because you’re eating by your damn self today and you can just forget about me sharing David Beckham with you EVER AGAIN.

Hater. I hate haters.

-Wena.





Some Hiatus….I Know.

16 05 2007


Just when I announce that I need a break from blogging, I find something that I need to blog about before I completely lose it. But since its my blog, I guess I can do that since I do what I want, huh?

Oh well.

Let me tell you about my crappy morning. So everyone knows that I’m in charge of lunches in the morning. There are 9 kids that need lunches so before my sister leaves for work, she does lunch prep, she does the lunch bags (puts the kids name on them) and she drops the fillers in. In the drinks and the snacks go, so all I have to do is make the sandwiches and make sure the kids take their lunches. Not such a big deal but every morning it’ll take me like twenty minutes to get the sandwiches made. So I’ll have time to take a shower, dress and get my daughter dressed and looking spiffy before we’re off. One thing that has been bugging me at home lately is that I’m missing a sweatshirt. One of my favorite sweatshirts that Mulu got me for my birthday a couple of years ago. It’s gone missing, nobody seems to know where it is and it bugs me and yet every morning, part of my routine is to ask all of the kids if they’ve seen my sweatshirt.

No luck yet.

If you get in the way of my little schedule, I’ll be more than a little annoyed with you. Especially if you’re a 16 year old lazy ass who nags me every damn morning for a ride to school. Let me explain to you how far away the high school is from my house.

Say I live on 220th Street. The school is on 222th Street.

You do the math.

Now, someone please explain to my niece why I’m always annoyed with her in the morning. She starts school at 7:50am every morning. She goes to Seminary which starts at 6 o’clock in the morning. Seminary (a Church class for high schoolers) ends at 6:45 and she’s usually back home before 7am. Her school is literally a 5 minute walk from my house.

Why can she NOT walk to school?

Oh that’s because she lags around the house before she finally gets around to getting dressed and when she gets ready, instead of gouging how much time she has to get ready and on to school without being late, she takes her time, straightening her hair and eating breakfast and chatting on her phone with her friends to see where to meet up before class to exchange whatever it is they exchange.

So this morning, I’m making the sandwiches and she starts in on her nagging. “Can you take me to school, I’m going to be late.”

I’m not paying any attention to her, her Mom is already gone and so it’s just me and the kids. I don’t answer her, I just continue making my turkey sandwiches for the kids. She stands in the kitchen just looking at me, I guess waiting for me to say something, oh and it’s 7:40.

“Ween, can you take me school. It’s almost 7:50.”

I shook my head and said, “No. I’m going to be late if I stop and take you. Why should I make myself late if you don’t care about being late.”

“Ween please? We got home late from Seminary cause my Mom had to stop off at the store.”

I stopped and just stared at her. “Chloe you got home 5 minutes later than usual, that shouldn’t make a damn bit of difference. You can still make it if you rush, run because I still need to shower.”

She starts whining about being late and blah blah blah, I sigh and tell her, “Alright this is the lasl time I’m taking you to school, if you’re late from this time forward, you’re on your own.”

She readily agrees and then I take her. We’re pulling up to the school and I can see her tense up. I look around to see what made her embarrassed and I almost crashed the car. Because not 3 feet from where we are is Chloe’s friend….wearing my fucking sweatshirt, that I’ve only been looking for the past 2 months.

Who the hell does that shit? Who takes someone elses clothes and gives them out for their friends to wear. I don’t care if Chloe or Chelsea wears my stuff, they’re my family. Just you know, put it back when you’re done with it. And if I ask about it and you KNOW where the hell it is, TELL ME so I don’t get all pissed off about it. Just FRICKING TELL ME! Don’t sit there and lie about not knowing where the hell it is, knowing damn well your friend (the one I can’t stand any damn way) has the thing. Oh and DON’T GIVE MY SHIT OUT FOR OTHER PEOPLE TO WEAR DAMMIT!

It pisses me off and she knew I was pissed. I didn’t say one word about it, I just said, “You wait until I get home.”

So then I get home, I’m already pissed as all get out but I shower since Chaylene finished up the sandwiches for me. After my shower, I have to rush to finish getting ready which means straightening my hair is out of the question so mousse it is today. I finished moussing my hair and then I put it up to dry off of my neck. I slip into my dress that I’m going to wear today, it goes great with my black wedges and the necklace that I bought a couple of weeks ago and the bracelet Mulu gave me for my birthday last year.

Only, the bracelet’s not in my jewelry box and neither is my necklace…in it’s place is a note from Chelsea.

“Ween I wore your necklace today, the one with the little circle pendant, I hope it’s okay you weren’t around for me to ask. Sorry.”

*sigh*

I swear, my morning set the tone for the rest of my day too because it just kept getting shittier and shittier…

Feck.





Dear Wena’s Co Workers,

10 01 2007

I really like working with you guys, really I do but there are just some of you that ride my frickin’ nerves to the point where I want to poke your eyes out and then dig my heels into your foot and make you cry out in pain. I hate that I feel like this about some of you but seriously, get a clue!

Here are my main issues with you guys, please stop all of this at once and we’ll get along just fine…=) I hope.

  • The Parking Spots.

Where did you guys get your damn driver’s licenses from? I mean seriously, how frickin’ hard is it to park your stupid dumb ass car in between the two white lines? I promise you, that there’s ample room in between both lines to park you stupid little piece of shit, Honda Accord without double parking into the next parking slot which I cannot park in now because your car takes up BOTH parking slots. And there are so many of you stupid asses that don’t know how to park, you with the bright lime green sports car? If you don’t know how to back your car into the parking slot, then…DON’T. Because now you’re in two parking slots instead of just one….and you, with the big ass 15 seater van, there’s a reason why the words COMPACT are printed in between the white lines, it’s for SMALL CARS which I can assure you, your car IS NOT.

Ugh.

  • Break Time.

Stop coming around me and my friends when we’re standing in the hallway shooting the breeze and casually looking at your watch like you’re trying to reprimand us for talking on company time, I don’t go walking around you and your friends when you take your 20 “15 minute” breaks during the day so you can smoke your cigarettes. My 1 break in the hallway doesn’t even come close to the amount of company time you waste in the parking lot puffing on your cigarettes, I don’t say anything about you and your 20 breaks, don’t say anything about how long I stand in the hallway and chat with my friends…especially since you’ll only catch me in the hallway about once or twice during the business day…you on the other hand are taking your how many is it now cigarette break and it’s only what time? Yeah, that’s what I thought…mind your business.

  • Making Popcorn in the Breakroom.

Gone are the days of pouring the kernels into the pop corn popper and placing the bowl under the popcorn popper where the popcorn would fall into. We live in a day and age where we have microwave popcorn, where all you gotta do is take off the plastic surrounding the popcorn bag and place the bag into the microwave and press POPCORN and then wah lah, the popcorn pops itself and you have one piping hot bag of great popcorn. It’s not so hard right? After all the Microwave in our break room comes supplied with it’s very own EASY BUTTON just like in all those Staples commercial, except ours doesn’t say EASY it says POPCORN…why then, is everyone in this office building burning popcorn? Do you guys smell the foul scent in the air? It’s another idiot burning the popcorn. How hard is it to press POPCORN and let the microwave do the rest? My sister and I poppped popcorn last week and all we did was press the popcorn button and we had great and burn odor free popcorn, seriously…you should just try it one day…just go on ahead and press popcorn, we’ll all thank you for it. *rolls eyes*

  • The Women’s Room.

I find it very bothersome when people make idle chit chat with me in the women’s room BEFORE I go to the bathroom…ummm, I need to use the bathroom and I’m going to pee on your shoes if you don’t shut the hell up and let me go to the bathroom in peace. If you want to talk to me, talk to me in my office or in the breakroom but not while I’m running into the bathroom, hopping from one foot to the other trying desperately NOT to pee on your shoes because I promise you, one of these days, I won’t care and just piss all over your new cutesy wedges.

Ugh.

And finally…

  • Shoes.

Whoever is walking around the hallway without their shoes on, PLEASE PUT THEM BACK ON! You’re not helping those of us who have to walk in the hallway and smell the feet funk you leave behind. I nearly fainted from how gross it smelled in the hallway and really, I’ve already got to battle the funk of the burnt popcorn, adding your feet funk is enough to kill me. I’m ’bout to get ghetto up in the office building because you guys just don’t seem to notice that there is a funk in the air around here that wasn’t there before so please…PLEASE, for the love of God, PUT THEM DAMN SHOES BACK ON THEM DAMN DOGS because if I find you, I will get the clownin’ and it won’t be pretty….

Please, if you can steer clear of these things, I’d be one happy camper and I would’t scowl so much in the hallways when you see me, alrighty? Thanks bunches!

Sincerely,
Rowena





I Need To Vent!

28 12 2006


So back in September, our company bought out a small business company and we’re in the process of merging both companies into one big, gigantic powerhouse company. All of the small business people moved into our building and a lot of our people moved to different parts of the building. Our AR department got moved downstairs as did our HR department, some of our direct businessmen got shipped to the next building and this is all in the hopes that we’d stop being two different companies and start being one company, united. We’re supposed to be this great big happy family, right?

Wrong.

I’ve heard nothing but complaints from people in our company about how rude and disrespectful their people are and their people don’t smile and say anything to our people when we cross paths in the hallway.

Let’s just say that the happy merge the higher uppers were hoping for is just not going to happen…not anytime soon anyway.

Now me, personally I say hi to everyone in the hallway, whether you’re from their company or ours, I’ll say hi to you because you guys brought donuts for us to eat last week and man, NO ONE has done that here in such a long time…myself included. LOL. Now, my friends have all had their complaints about this stupid shit from this department and that stupid shit from that department but I’ve always been the one that said, “Well, she was nice to me.”

Not today.

Okay, I’m the Contracts Department Admin and the department fax machine is in my office. When faxes come in, I usually just run them over to whoever it belongs to, since its just down the hall. I don’t have to do it, but I do because I’m nice like that. Now, if the owner of the fax is on the phone, I’ll quietly hand them the fax and they’ll take it, mouth a “thank you” and I’ll be on my merry way. I don’t try to converse with them while they’re on the phone, but I don’t ever use the Inbox outside my boss’ office, mainly because some of the stuff that gets faxed to them (both of my bosses, the boss and then my boss boss) shouldn’t be left around for just anyone to walk by and grab. They get mods for different contracts faxed to them, or memo’s from clients and well, they’ve always just said to hand it to them, so I do.

Well this new chick, we’ll call her Hoecakes from the small business company we bought out works in our building now, she works in the Contracts Department so I support her now as well. I’ve been told time and time again that she’s a bitch but I never believed it because she was always civil to me, she was never rude or disrepectful until today.

So Hoecakes gets a fax today and I walk it over to her office. When I get there, she’s on the phone so I’m trying to just hand it to her and leave but she won’t even acknowledge me. So I look for someplace to just set it down where she can see it, but her desk is littered with errant papers and there’s a folder holder on top of her desk like the one shown to the right.
While still on the phone, she points to that stupid folder holder. Does she want me to put it there? If I do, the papers are going to fall off, I mean, the thing is not level, there’s no way that it’ll stay right? So I try to just hand it to her and she then points to her door, so now I’m just thinking, “Would you just grab this shit and let me leave already?” So there I am, trying to just set the fax down when she sighs all loud like and says into the phone, “Can you hold on, Bob?”

She pierces me with this withering look that reminded me of the Wicked Witch from the Wizard of Oz and then she points to her door and says, “There’s a box hanging outside my door called an Inbox, why don’t you try using that sometime?”

What the eff?

I could only stand there and gape at her because I was blown away that she would talk to me that way. Now, I don’t know if that’s what they used back at her small business but that’s not how we do things here in the Contracts Department at OUR company, she don’t work for her company anymore, she works for OURS, so bitch you gotta do things OUR WAY…oh and before I could reply she snatches the fax out of my hands and barks out, “Just give it to me and get out”

Oh.Hell.No.

Did I say anything mean to her? Oh hell no.. Am I going to forget this little thing? You bet your bottom dollar that I won’t be forgetting this anytime soon and she wants to see bitch? I’ll show her bitch…

Stupid bitch.





What’s Stuck Up Her Ass?

6 12 2006


Ugh.

I have this friend here at work that I sometimes love to death because of the cool things she does for me and then I sometimes hate because she drives me insane.

Lately, she’s been doing a lot of driving me insane things more than the sweet things so I’m starting to really not like her. And really, it’s three main things that I just can’t stand about her and no amount of telling her about herself, aka checking her about those things has changed a hot damn thing and I’m just about ready to throw in the towel with it all.

I need to vent this out so I’m just going to list the things that she does that drives me up the wall and what I’ve tried to do to tame her ass down.

#1. The way she oogles hot guys.

When we first became friends, it was because we both shared a love for International hotties, I remember telling you guys a while back that a foreign accent melts my insides and every year, Mulu and I attend the IRB Rugby 7’s Tournament, which used to be held here in L.A. and this tournament is filled to the brim with international hotties. I invited her to come with us to the tournament and she happily agreed. When she got to the tournament, I swear Mulu wanted to strangle me. Not only is she stupid about the way she oogles guys, she’s so stupid that not only does she make the ones witnessing her oogling red in the face, she also has to go one step further and embarass the hell out of the guy she’s oogling. Like Eye Candy Dan. My friend Theresa used to have the hots for this guy that we know socially, named Dan. We dubbed him Eye Candy Dan because Therese thought he was really cute. Well, he was at the tournament we were at and sitting a few seats away from me and Mulu. We were all having a good time, cheering our team on and just joking around with each other when she notices Dan.

She couldn’t just tell us, “Dang, he looks good!” Like we’ve been doing all day long. Oh no, she’s got to stand up, stare him down until it looked as if she was sucking his soul from his body and then she’s gotta say, “I want a picture of him” She gets her camera phone out and hands it to Theresa and tells her to go and get a picture, by this time, EVERYONE and their Mom was embarrassed but does that deter her from her purpose? Oh no, she rushes Theresa over to take his picture and when Theresa stands up, Dan and his friends are standing as well and Dan is making a beeline out of the damn stadium with his snickering friends following close behind and you would think that that was the end of the story right? Oh hell no, my friend starts shrieking, “HE’S LEAVING, HE’S LEAVING, GET THE PICTURE GET THE PICTURE” like some damn lunatic. I could have drowned myself in the toilet, I was so frickin’ embarrassed.

But she’s like that with EVERY HOT GUY that comes into her line of vision. It’s super embarrassing when we see one of the Rugby guys that works with us. We’ll see him when we’re walking to the Cafeteria and he’ll always stop to say hi or whatever, but you can tell that he doesn’t want to because my friend stares him down and checks his ass out while he’s trying to say goodbye and walk away. Then there’s the Husband, who we all know that I want to marry (if he wasn’t already married) he’s very nice and friendly (which goes against everything I’ve heard about British people but there you go) and so I’m not sure if he’s just blind to the way she undresses him with her eyes or if he’s just used to, I’m thinking he’s used to everyone undressing him with their eyes since he’s so hot damn beautiful, but everytime he comes into the hallway and we see him, I try my hardest to run away before she can make an ass out of the both of us.

Ugh. It’s horrible.

#2. Her constant bitching.

The woman clearly has it in her brain that someone here in the office building is out to get her. Why? Because the guy she used to work with had this big grudge against her because he held her responsible for their boss getting laid off. If you asked me, the reason why their old boss got laid off was because the punk ass was never here. My friend did the work of both her boss and her own work and yet the boss was getting paid this insane amount of money to delegate ALL of her duties to my friend. It was common knowledge around here so why he holds my friend responsible for it, is beyond me but some people are just stupid you know? Well anyway, ever since her big boss got laid off and was replaced by the new loser who is her boss, she’s been very bitter about the way that the little man has turned everyone against her. Or so she thinks.

From an outsider’s POV, I think that all of this hogwash is totally in her head. No one treats her any different than they treat others, with polite indifference and yet she swears that everyone is out to get her. I have told her time and time again that nobody cares enough about her to do all of the stupid things she says they’re doing. So they didn’t say hi to you in the hallway? SO WHAT? They got really quiet when you walked into the room, SO WHAT? If they were talking about you, then let them do it, dont’ let them get you down because they’re stupid. You know that half of everything they’re saying isn’t true so why do you let yourself get down because of what they’re saying about you? LET IT GO…don’t let them dictate the way your day is going to turn out. I have told her so many times that she chooses to let them bother her, she chooses to stay pissed off at the world because of things she can’t control.

She’d be a lot happier if she’d just mind her own and just go on with her business. I know that there are people in this world that hate my guts, but I will not let them get me so riled that I’m going to be pissed off every minute of everyday. I don’t care about them so why should I let them bother me? That’s what they want. They want to make her miserable and she’s the dumb one that’s letting them.

No amount of talking will shut her up about all this crap either, she just loves to stew in her own misery. And I’m just about done with tolerating her shit. It gets really old having the same damn conversation about how much everyone hates you.

Ugh, shut up already. And that’s why her frickin’ ringtone when she calls me is SO WHAT by Field Mob and Ciara. It fits her perfectly, I think.

#3. She’s Miss Know It All.

She’s so consumed with her body image that it makes me sick. She is NOT skinny, she is NOT the prettiest girl I’ve ever seen but when she chooses her personality can make up for all of that stuff. I’m so tired of her telling me how pretty my hair is and how pretty my clothes are, how cute my shoes are and then telling me how fat she is and how ugly she is. It’s like, the way you present yourself to the world is how everyone is going to see you, Sharon.

She went out for this job and she didn’t get it, oh it was because she’s fat and ugly, she really thinks that the only way to get ahead in life is by being a skinny, pretty bitch. And I’m like, “How the hell do you figure that Sharon? If that’s true then what the hell is Bill Gates doing being rich? And Donald Trump? Do NOT tell me that you think he’s hot because according to you, only beautiful people can get jobs and get paid…”

I mean, seriously?

*rolls eyes*

Oh and because she’s got dark skin, she’s not black or anything, she’s just a foreigner from Panama, but because she’s “black” everyone thinks bad things about her before trying to get to know her. And before I met her, I had not heard one thing bad about her, but she swears that because she’s “black” everyone views her in a bad light. It’s like, “Where the hell do you get your crap from?”

If that’s the case, then why does everyone like and respect all of my other black friends at work? Why do they not have the same problems that you do? Me thinks the problem isn’t black people but YOU sweetie…seriously.

And you can’t tell the bitch anything either. She knows it all, so don’t think that you can teach her anything, because if it’s not something she wants to hear, she won’t hear it. We see a movie trailer for something, the first thing out of her mouth is some hogwash backstory on whatever it is the movie is about. We hear a song on the radio and she’ll tell you where Chris Brown got his inspiration from, it’s like, SHUT UP and listen to the damn song, SHEESH! You hand her a dollar bill and she’ll tell you what George Washington was thinking when he cut the cherry tree down.

It’s like SHOOT ME NOW!

We’re at a place in our friendship now, where I will bitch at her to just shut up. She says something smart and sarcastic about something, I’ll be sarcastic and bitchy right back to her, even if she says something about someone I dont’ like at work, I’ll still bitch at her. She thinks that everyone is nice to me at work, because my sister works here and she’s known as the Office Angel.

Bitch please, maybe they’re nice to me because I’m nice to them and I don’t view them as a potential backstabber before I’ve even talked to them. She’s driving me up the frickin’ wall, I stopped asking her to go to lunch, I’ve stopped answering my phone when she calls, because I just can’t be arsed to feel sorry for her anymore…that shit is OLD! And she knows that until she can get a hold on her attitude and her thoughts, I won’t be dealing with her anymore but I feel bad because without me there to steer her away from the people that I know don’t like her, she doesn’t have much else.

Which is why she’s moving to Florida just as soon as she’s done with school. And though part of me feels bad for her, because she’s all alone out here while her family is all together in New York, I can’t help but count down the days when she’ll be GONE!

Ugh, there’s my vent of the week!





I Need to Vent.

1 11 2006


*sigh*

This post is going to be one long ass vent and I need to vent this frustration out so if you don’t feel like reading about some drama, then come back tomorrow. I’m writing this post because the other night, my two nieces, Chloe and Chelsea and I had a “talk”. They wanted to vent their pieces and I tried, unsuccessfully to explain to them why I’ve “changed”.

I made a muck of my explanation when I was talking to them, so I wanted to explain my piece here, in hopes of figuring out just what is wrong with me. LOL. So that when I attempt to set my nieces straight, I’ll know exactly why I’m not around as much anymore.

A little background into the “talk” from the other night. We were the only ones home, with the kids, so me, Chloe and Chelsea are in the kitchen making dinner for the kids that were home and we’re talking, cracking jokes and doing what we do the best, laughing. Things quickly turned serious when Chelsea stated how pissed she was at her Dad for not letting her go to my brother, Pete’s house this past weekend, she mentioned that if it was her Uncle Tim, her Dad would have let her move in with him, but she couldn’t spend ONE flippin’ night at her Uncle Pete’s house. Uncle Tim, is her Dad’s brother. They asked me why I don’t stay for Sunday dinner anymore, and the truth of the matter is, I don’t want to be home anymore. I don’t remember the last Sunday dinner I stayed home for. I’m always either at Theresa’s house or Mulu’s house and now that Ralph is living near Mulu, I just might be at Ralph’s house from now on…B Nice, I haven’t forgotten you either, I’ll make my way over to your house as well. =) Anyway, there are a few reasons why I don’t stay home for Sunday To’ona’i anymore and here are some of the reasons.

My main gripe is with my brother in law. He can be the biggest ass in the entire whole fecking world and the kicker of it all is that he doesn’t even know it. There have been plenty of times that I can recall where I just wanted to sock him in his damn mouth. You see, he’s been losing a whole lot of weight, I think so far he’s lost like 85-90 pounds since January and though his body weight is getting smaller, his head is getting TOO BIG! Get over yourself already, really you are NOT the business, you’re still the person everyone hated at Church, growing up and you’ve still got the power to clear the room whenever you walk into the room. So really, you’re not the shit like you think you are. Unless, you’re the kind of shit that stinks up the room.

I can be the most naive person in the whole of my little world, because I’m just NOW seeing things that my friends have seen in my brother in law from the jump and I swear, it’s irritating the snot out of me. You see, my brother in law just got his degree and you’d swear he just received his God papers the way he walks around. There have been a couple of instances where he’s said some off the wall things that are just so hurtful…and he pays no mind at all to who he hurts with his remarks.

Earlier in the year, my brother Pete used to work for my BIL. BIL gave him a job because he needed one and so there you had it. It was a good move on the BIL since he needed all the help he could get at work, so he hired Pete and about 7 months ago, we find out that Tiffany is pregnant and not too long after that, Ron fires Pete. We all understood why he did it, weren’t mad at Ron for doing it, since Pete did miss a lot of work. So, then Pete starts working with my other brothers, doing plumbing and he’s really good at it. My brother, Mel took Pete under his wing and has taught him everything he knows about plumbing and about life in general, mind you, Mel is also the person we call to come and fix every little thing in our house that gets broken, the sink is clogged? The bathroom is flooded? The drain is backed up? Mel fixes ALL OF THAT FOR FREE, we need a plumber to come out to our house at least four times a month, can you imagine the amount of money that would cost us if we called a plumber to come in to fix our house, since Ron doesn’t know how to fix anything? *shakes head* Anyway, Pete’s learned a whole lot and he’s starting to turn into the responsible man we all knew he could be, we’re all really proud of Pete, my brothers have nothing but good things to say about Pete and how he’s doing at work. About two weeks ago, maybe three, my BIL approaches Pete and asks him to come back to work for him. Pete declines and tells him that he’s doing really good at the job he’s at right now and the pay is better, to which Ron’s reply was, “So you mean to tell me that you want to be a 40 year old plumber just like your brother?” The way he said it gave Pete pause and had his defenses jump right on up, then with all the pride he had in his brother, said, “Yeah, I do.”

I had talked to my sister about Ron asking Pete to go back to work for him, she said that he wanted to make sure that Pete had insurance with the baby coming along and what not. My thing with that is, he knew Pete was going to have a baby when he fired him all those months ago, why is he worried about Pete and the baby now, now that he’s got a steady job, and is happy at his new job? Whatever.

And then…what the hell is wrong with being a plumber? Is that job so beneath him? How dare he insult the man who comes to make sure that everything in HIS house is working smoothly so he doesn’t have to. How dare he insult the line of work that makes honest money because he’s got something so much better at his job, for my brother.

Well you know what? Take that job and choke on it.

When my brother, Pete was telling me this, I could picture the whole conversation because it is SO something he would say. He’s just so damn annoying, it’s not even funny. And to think, that I asked Pete why Mel doesn’t come around anymore and this is what I find out. What a dick.

He says and does things that just get on my nerves and I’m just really over him. It’s hard to just be civil to him because he makes it so hard. He’s the most selfish person I’ve ever met and I guess right now, I just don’t like being around him anymore. He’s going to push my sister into snapping and when she does, it’s not going to be pretty. He’s alienated most of my family (the boys in particular) and he hurt my parents feelings the other Sunday and I really just can’t stand it anymore.

The other Sunday, Chelsea called her other grandparents (his parents) to ask them if they were coming or not, because they were waiting on them to sit down and eat dinner. She was informed that they were NOT coming, so they all sit down to eat and wait for Ron to come out of the room, where he’s laying down and he refused to come and eat with them. But about ten minutes after they start eating, his parents show up and BAM, he comes into the dining room, empties my sister’s entire plate of food onto my niece’s plate and then proceeds to fix himself a plate WITH MY SISTERS PLATE. My Mom was upset because he refused to come eat with them but as soon as his parents came, he was hungry again, she felt like he was too good to eat with them and then without a thought to their feelings, comes out and eats all of the food that THEY prepared. My parents spoil us rotten, every Sunday they make a feast and bring all of the food to our house to eat. They did it mostly for the kids and us, because it’s just them two at their house but they’re just not feeling the love with him (Ron) anymore. So much so, that they’re not going to be joining Sunday to’ona’i anymore…it’s this instance wrapped up with other instances that have just formed into this big ball of frustration that is driving everyone away.

So, how do I tell Chloe and Chelsea that the reason I don’t come around as often anymore is because I can’t stand their Dad? Those of you guys who know my living arrangement, know about THOSE issues that I have with him and it’s just too many things on top of other things and I just really don’t care for him anymore. I’m looking to get out and just as soon as I find the perfect place, I’m collecting the money I gave him for my room and will be taking off, much to the chagrin of Chloe and Chelsea. They cried when I told them I want to move out. Then they asked me if they can move in with me when they both turn 18.

And the reason they both want to move out is…their Dad.

Ugh, gosh he’s such an ass.





Why Do They Do It?

28 10 2006


I was having such a good day, I had a fabulous lunch with my friends from work, I snuck away to the bookstore before coming back to work and lucked out, spending 10 bucks on like 14 books, made plans to come back and buy some more books at the everything in the store is half off sale going on at my UBS and even racked up 4 more free books from my UBS by all my purchases, I swear the lady over there loves me. I came back to work and instead of working, it’s Friday so I’m blog hopping and just going on my merry way when I come across, my friend’s blog and read this.

La Chou is a blog friend that I met through Nicole. She has one of those blogs, that you go to because you know that there’s always something good to read over there. She’s a sweet person, who’s lived a very full and colorful life. She’s not the most perfect of people, but she’s by no means a bad person either. I think she is one of the sweetest people I’ve ever had the pleasure of getting to know through blogs. She leads a more daring life than me and there have been times when I’m reading her blog when I’ve envied her a bit because she’s just so cool, you know, kind of like the popular girl at school, the ones that everyone loves to hate? Well that’s how La Chou is, she’s the popular girl that everyone hates because she’s just too cool for school, you know?

But I don’t hate her.

Not at all.

I freaking love the woman, you hear that, Michelle? I love you! You are a great person and I can’t believe that this is happening to you. I’m sorry that this is happening to you. I can only say that this is happening to you because someone out there is so sad and pathetic and hating their life that they’re trying to take you down with them.

You see, dear readers, someone printed out all of La Chou’s Archives and sent them to her parents. That’s right, they printed it out, boxed it up, and even had the balls to write an Annonymous letter to Michelle’s (that’s La Chou’s name) parents, the jist of the letter (this is from her blog, so if you want to read the blog, you can read it here)

Dear La Chou’s Parents,
I am ashamed and appalled that people like you are in our church. I found this site on the internet, and you must be so pretentious going to church with a daughter like that….yada, yada, yada. In fact, I won’t be going to that church because your daughter is like this.
Anonymous

How sad is that? La Chou grew up just like me, in a Christian home and her parents are bummed to have gotten this and things are a little tense between them right now, but I have faith Michelle that things will work out for you….and your parents. I have faith that everything will work itself out.

I hope you don’t get rid of your blog, but if you do, I hope you start another one so that I can continue to be your blog friend, because I’d miss you terribly if you went away…you’re apart of my weekly blog hop, so you have to stick around, okay? Take some time off and don’t let stupid punks like “Annonymous” get you down, don’t let them win! You’re a woman of worth and I have so enjoyed getting to know you through your blog and I hope to continue to do so sweetie.

Why do people have to be so frickin’ cruel? I know that I’m not the perfect Mormon and there are a lot of things that Mom HATES that I do, she hates that I read romance novels, she hates that I’m on the computer all the time, she thinks the Internet is of the devil and last night, she called me and scolded me about having a myspace, telling me that nothing good can ever come from having a myspace and she urged me to get rid of mine (this was AFTER I got scolded from my sister, Blanche about myspace too, UGH!), she’s not a fan of worldly things and she considers computers among the worldly things, so she hates them.

But, should she ever find this blog (and Delene if you’re reading this and you tell Mom, I WILL slash your tires), I know that she’d be disappointed, but she wouldn’t disown me or hate me for it. So, I guess what I’m trying to say, and this is for you, La Chou, your parents love you and no matter how mad they get at you, or what you do to disappoint them (though I don’t think you have anything to feel ashamed about, you’re a GREAT person), they’ll stick by you….because that’s what family does and because they love you, you’ll get passed all of this.

I’m just sorry that you had to go through this at all.

Big Hugs sweetie, know that I’m thinking of you and will miss you terribly if you were really to leave us! DON’T LEAVE! Grrrr, people are often so cruel to others for no reason, and I absolutely HATE that, I hate that instead of going to Michelle personally, they went behind her back to snitch her out to her parents, becuase she dared to have a life and share it with her readers. I hate that my friends get hurt and I hate when my friends don’t even know who their accusers are because they were not ballsy enough to own up to being little rat bastard snitches!

((((((La Chou)))))))

Love,
Dylan





I’m Not Feeling The Love Around Here…

6 10 2006


The other day, I worked through my lunch hour because lately I’ve been leaving work early for soccer practice, so by 4 o’clock, I was tired and extremely hungry, since I didn’t take the time to go grab something to eat.

So as I was slaving away in my office, trying to get some contract closeouts taken care of, my friend Sharon comes into my office and asks me if I’m going to the party. I gave her a blank look because I had no idea what the hell she was talking about. She goes on to tell me about the invitation that B (our friend) sent out the day before.

I guess it was The Big Boss’s birthday yesterday and she was holding a little cake and ice cream social in the small conference room for him. I didn’t get the memo. No, seriously. I didn’t get the memo. So, as people start gathering in crowds outside of my office, laughing and joking around, I call my sister to see if she was invited to the ice cream birthday and sure enough, she was. By this time, like fifteen minutes have passed and my friend, Sharon is telling me to just come and have some cake, who cares if I didn’t get invited, Ummm, yeah right, I’m not going to crash the big bosses ice cream social, so there I am, sitting in my office while Sharon leaves still on the phone with my sister, who leaves work at 2pm, so though she was invited, she didn’t go because she had already left for the day. I swear to you guys, she invited the whole damn building because I heard so many different coversations going on and it was pretty loud and I saw so many people walking past my door to the “party”, stupid bitches.

So while everyone is sitting in the conference room which is three doors down from mine, singing happy birthday and laughing and being merry, I’m sitting in my office furiously looking through my Inbox to make sure that I didn’t miss the damn invitation, but sure as certain there’s no damn memo in my inbox that invites me to the little shin dig down the hallway. And everyone was invited, everyone in my department was there, my sister who gets off at 2pm was invited, her loud ass friend that sits next to her, even the receptionist downstairs was invited and not me.

Ugh, I’m SO not feeling the love in this office right now.

So about twenty minutes later, I get an email from my friend, Sharon who forwards the invitation to me and just as I knew it, my name isn’t on there, dammit. Sharon then tells me that I didn’t miss anything and the cake sucked, but still my feelings were hurt.

So, to make things all better, Mulu picked me up and treated me to dinner…with dessert. She’s the best best friend, EVER! And our cake was MUCH better than her stale ass carrot cake ANYWAY.

I’m so never going to proofread her emails anymore…she can damn well do them herself.





OMFRICKIN’ HELL!

30 09 2006

I’m so pissed right now it’s not even funny.

I want to do that stupid asshat of an old fart of a soccer Dad some serious damage. Let me tell you guys what happened.

Last week at practice, one of the Soccer Dad’s on our team, irritated my sister. He came walking onto the field, where we practice talking on his cell phone in a Kids Zone, where you’re supposed to adhere to certain rules set out by our region. One of those rules is language. You cannot curse, yell or use inappropriate language in a Kids Zone area. Well, this particular Dad came onto the field, talking loudly into his phone about what a fucking joke this contract is, I can’t believe that asshole got that promotion and just using that kind of language, but because our practice was just starting, my sister asked me who he was. Of course, she asked me all this in Samoan, so I answer her in turn. So there we are, getting our little gossip on in Samoan about this guy and as soon as his call was over, he quit talking altogether, so we just left it alone.

Then practice started.

His daughter’s name is Meghan. She’s a little porker too. I like Meghan, I like all the kids on my team, but gosh that Meghan cries for every damn contact that comes her way. So, there we are, scrimmaging against each other and the ball goes out, another girl on the team rushes for the ball to throw in, but it’s not her team throw in, so I told her to give the ball to Meghan to throw in. She got all attitudy and tossed the ball toward Meghan and it hit Meghan in the mouth. Not hard, or anything, just tapped her in the mouth and Meghan starts crying her little fat mouth off. I scolded Michelle and told her to apologize, which she readily did, she even went over to Meghan and gave her a hug. Meghan stops crying and then about fifteen minutes later, I call out for a water break.

While the girls are getting their water, I’m fixing the cones on the field and taking a quick drink of water myself and then some of the girls are walking back to the field, talking and laughing with each other when I hear a deep voice, getting pretty loud behind me. I turn to see what’s going on and the asshat of a Dad, Meghan’s Dad is up in Michelle’s face, telling her that she better watch who she’s throwing the ball at and she better not throw the ball at Meghan like that again or else.

Or else, what?

This fucking prick was up in Michelle’s face like he was going to spank her. Umm, hello??? You’re not the Coach, you don’t talk to my girls like that, you got a problem you talk to me, so I jump up and I bark out, “Excuse me? Don’t take that tone of voice with Michelle.”

He just looked at me and said, “Oh you just stay out of it, this is between me and her, she threw the ball at my daughter, I know,”

This is when my sister comes in and she’s all, “If you’ve got a problem with one of the girls you come to us, you dont’ talk to the girls like that.”

So he starts getting loud or whatever and my sister, fearless woman that she is starts getting loud back. He ends the argument by telling us to talk to Meghan, that Meghan will tell us what happened, this is when I told him I didn’t need to ask anyone anything since I was standing right there when it happened. It wasn’t intentional, she already apologized for it and I took care of it, Michelle was completely contrite, so there was no reason that he had to come in and put his two cents in, stupid bastard prick.

A few of the other Dad’s that were there, all sat up a little straighter in their chairs, but none of them said anything and then it was just me and Blanche and that asshat of a Dad going at it, but Blanche told me to leave it be. But man I was fuming.

So anyway, that was last week, I thought it had all blown over, but aparently not, because Meghan’s Mom came up to me at the game today and told me that she didn’t appreciate the story that Meghan and the Dad came home with.

What the fuck?

This is how it is. You don’t like something that goes on at practice, then you address your concerns to ME, the COACH or my ASSISTANT COACH, Blanche. You don’t go up to a 7 year old girl that is NOT your daughter and try to tell her how to behave, or even yell at her for any reason. You have NO right to yell at someone else’s kid and do not come at me for defending a poor 7 year old girl who was probably shitting bricks in her pants because some old ass man was yelling at her, when her parents weren’t there. You don’t want your daughter to get hit with a soccer ball, TAKE HER THE HELL OUT OF THE SPORT THEN! Soccer is damn contact sport, how do you expect to be any good in the sport if you’re afraid of getting hurt by an errant soccer ball?

Get real.

Gosh it pissed me off so bad that I’m probably sure that steam was coming out of my ears with the effort it took to keep my sharp retort in check. I had to bite the inside of my cheek to keep from going off on this stupid ass who wasn’t even there to see what happened, and yet she just knew everything that happened, well screw you and your stupid husband. You dont know shit.

And if you don’t like the way I coach the team, then you should’ve volunteered to coach your damn self, but since you didn’t, shut you stupid mouth and get out of my face.

Our team Mom, who was there and listened to both me and Blanche vent about what happened, told the stupid ass Mom, what happened and that the only things me and Blanche told her stupid fuck of a husband was that if he had any concerns with the way Meghan was being treated at practice that he approach them, that he couldn’t approach the girls the way he did at practice and well, she must have felt stupid or something because she shut up and just gave us a fake smile and then walked away.

I just looked at Blanche, who was across the way from me and if there wasn’t all these people around me, I would have flipped her off. Stupid punks.

Some of the Fathers that were there, came and asked me if everything was okay. I told them what she said and Katelyn’s dad (who is a cutie) told me that he’d be glad to go and have a talk with the stupid Dad and straighten him out for me.

I almost let him too.

Freakin’ A, the nerve of these damn people.





Dear Cingular,

31 08 2006


I would sincerely appreciate it if you’d get Customer Service people who don’t act as if all callers are lying to you and that everything coming out of the customer’s mouth is hogwash, because I assure you, I was sorely tempted to walk away from my contract with you guys yesterday. I spent lots of money on my spiffy SLVR a few months ago, something I don’t always do but I so liked the little phone, it was cute and it had ITunes on it, so I spent the $200 to buy it and this is the thanks that I get? You see, this is what happened…

Yesterday I got an email from my sister Grace, all the way in Australia telling me that she tried calling me but that her call wouldn’t go through.

Immediately, I turned my phone on and checked it and sure enough, it says that my service was interrupted. How odd, since I just paid my phone bill the week before (I came equipped with a confirmation number for my payment too, thank you very much) and even then, don’t you guys normally wait like a month or so before they interrupt service? Especially if I’ve paid my bill EVERY MONTH for the past like ten years (I’ve had this phone since the year after I graduated from high school), well there was that little incident with my sister from a few months ago, but that was taken care of, but whatever…so I tried calling Grace, no such luck, so I try calling somewhere local, since Grace is in Australia, I try calling home with no luck, I can’t get through because the recording says my line has been temporarily interrupted, please contact Cingular to pay my bill, again, WHAT THE HELL???

So I called you guys up and wanted to know what was going on. After explaining my situation or problem to the first person that helped me, she was really nice, I’ll give you guys that, she had me turn my phone off, wait a few minutes then it should work itself out, she said that it was probably a glitch in my phone or something (Umm, yeah a glitch in my phone that tells me that my service is interrupted, umm okay), so with her still on the line, I wait a few minutes then turn my phone back on, thinking the problem is solved, but find out that it isn’t. She transfers me over to second person, whom I wanted to strangle.

This new guy asks me what my problem is, I tell him, he asks me if I’m sure that there’s a problem with my service because according to the computer that he’s looking at, which has all of my account information, he says that everything looks fine. No glitches, no suspension, no nothing.

Why, pray tell, would I be on the phone talking to your stupid ass, if everything was fine with my phone?

Ugh.

I can’t call or recieve any calls, it says that my service was interrupted, I don’t give a hot damn what it says on your computer, my phone is not working, can you help me fix it?

“But are you sure, ma’am?” he says. “I mean, I’m looking at your account right now and plain as can be, it says, account active. I just don’t understand why this is happening to you.”

By this time, I’m trying really hard not to lose my temper, I don’t like confrontation, I don’t like to be mean to the customer service people because I know how many pissed off customers that they deal with on a daily basis, but HOT DAMN WOULD YOU STOP ASKING ME IF I’M SURE, I’M SURE THAT MY DAMN PHONE DOESN’T WORK, I’M SURE THAT THERE’S A RECORDING ON MY DAMN PHONE TELLING ME THAT MY SERVICE IS INTERRUPTED, WHAT I’M NOT SURE ABOUT IS WHY THE HELL YOU KEEP ASKING ME IF I’M SURE, YES I AM AND I STILL CAN’T MAKE OR RECEIVE ANY CALLS…you dumb stupid prick!

So after a frustrating fifteen minutes telling him that I am indeed sure that all of this is really happening, he has me turn my phone off, take my battery out and take my SIM card out and blow on it and then turn it back on….”It should work fine as can be ma’am, you probably just didn’t clean out your battery or something, those things can get lint in it and then jack up the whole phone.”

Oh so now it’s my fault because I didnt check the lint in my damn phone?

So I ask him, “I don’t see how the lint in my phone would suspend my account, are you sure that’s whats wrong with my phone?”

He makes all these, I KNOW IT ALL noises and I turn my phone back on, he tries to call me, and STILL no service.

“Did you make sure to shake your phone and blow hard into it?”

OMGosh by now I want to strangle him, he says all this nonsense about what I didn’t do to my phone and I get fed up, I ask to speak to his manager, he pretends he doesn’t hear me, so I ask again, firmly. He’s like, “Well is there anything else I can do for you today ma’am?”

You haven’t done a good damn thing for me yet, let me speak to your damn manager. He thanks me for calling him and then transfers me to….the IT people.

I’m so damn frustrated because no one appears to know what I’m talking about or know what’s wrong with my phone, I talk to two other people, a total of 4 people in one day, for a total of 65 minutes and yet, NO ONE will transfer me to a manager and no one knows what’s wrong with my phone, which they were all quick to tell me. I got a lot of, “Ma’am, I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with your phone.”

It was enough to drive me insane. The last person I talked to, said she was going to have file a report on this, open up a claim and whatever else, saying that they would have check into this and when I asked her what I would do for a phone until then, she says, “You’re just going to have to sit tight, ma’am.”

What the flip?

I was more than a little pissed off that I didn’t have a phone last night or this morning, when I came to work this morning, my phone STILL wasn’t working, so I called again, went through the same thing twice and then finally, someone came to my rescue and in less then twenty minutes, my phone was back on and everything seemed to be okay.

What did I get for my patience (for just wishing them harm and not really telling them?), they’re not going to charge me or take away any of the minutes I use for the next three days, so that means, my hotline is open guys….LOL.

So Cingular, I started out very pissed off at you guys but since I’m a God fearing woman, I have forgiven you, but PLEASE, don’t let it happen again.

Sincerely,
Dylan